Are You Afraid?

Afraid – feeling fear, whether real or imagined, a distressing emotion aroused by the unknown.

I stood alone in my newly remodeled kitchen, liking my chosen decorative changes. My eyes were drawn to a flowerpot of herbs I had planted and placed in the window. The plants in the front of the pot looked lush and green. But when I turned the container around to look at the contents in its entirety, the herbs on the other side had dried up and died.

The dried and withered plants hid behind the vibrant, lush plants. They were in the same pot. I gave them the same amount of nourishment. They had the same amount of sunlight, yet they still chose to die. I stuck my hands in the soil, preparing to remove and trash the dead dried herbs.

Then, I had a conversation with myself. Nobody trashed you when you felt you were dying spiritually. You hid in the background behind other talented vessels for years until you finally decided to live. So, at least let these dry, and what appears dead herbs choose to live. I decided to leave them alone. Maybe they will come back to life, I thought. Maybe these dry roots will live again? I rinsed the soil from my hands and headed towards the porch to sit and relax.

Before that, I had been watching a video of myself where I had recently ministered at a conference. Before stepping onto the porch area, I paused to watch it momentarily. I laughed out loud, remembering I was just like those dead herbs in the pot. I also hid behind those who were not afraid to step up and minister. For years, I was scared, and it was easy to hide behind those who were not. What would people think of me? Would I say the wrong thing? Am I qualified or capable of speaking on GOD’s behalf?

I looked at that video a moment longer and said, “LORD, I like the place where you have led me. Thank You for encouraging me to do what You called me to do. You didn’t give up on me even when I was afraid.”  I headed towards the porch to sit down and relax.